33: How To Feel Confident Having Sex With Someone New
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How To Feel Confident Having Sex With Someone New
After my last break up, I chose not to have sex for over four years.
During that time, feelings of embarrassment and shame for going so long without came up and I was also faced with many new fears: what if no one found me attractive ever again?
What if no one wanted to have sex with me?
What if someone new didn’t like my body?
What if I’ve forgotten how to have sex and perform badly for someone new?
In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I share the practical strategies I used to help me increase my sexual confidence again so that when the time came for me to jump into bed with someone new, not only would I feel ready for it, but I’d feel my most sexually empowered, most sexually confident self.
If you’re feeling nervous about having sex with someone new, this episode’s for you.
Here’s a peek at what we cover:
1. Facing Post-Breakup Insecurities: I discuss the challenges and self-doubt that can arise after a significant relationship ends, leading to a hiatus from sexual encounters.
2. The Importance of Sexual Confidence: I emphasise the significance of feeling confident in your own skin and explore the impact of self-assurance on the overall experience of sex.
3. Three Layers of Confidence: Introducing The 90/90 Mindset Concept, I break down the three layers of confidence you need to master, focusing on how these layers apply to sexual confidence.
4. Positive Self-Talk: I share my simple strategy for shifting negative thoughts to positive beliefs, encouraging excitement and anticipation for future sexual experiences.
5. Acting Confident: We look at practical tips including investing in attractive underwear, using perfume, and maintaining good self care habits to feel sexy and confident, even when not in a relationship.
6. Conjuring Up Confidence: I reveal the enjoyable exercise you can use to conjure up feelings of confidence in your body within minutes so that when the time comes for sex with someone new, your body’s used to these feelings.
7. Self-Fulfilment: As an advocate for fulfilling your own sexual needs, we talk about building an intimate connection with yourself to enhance confidence and enjoyment during partnered experiences.
8. Building Trust: While discussing trust in the context of sexual encounters, I’m encouraging you to trust your instincts and communicate openly with your partner(s).
Throughout the episode, I touch on the importance of detachment, honesty and self-awareness when re-entering the dating and sexual scene, offering a relatable and empowering perspective on embracing your sexuality.
Check out The Confidence Course for more practical tools to increase your self confidence - sexual and otherwise.
Episodes mentioned:
This Simple Concept Will Help You Date with Confidence
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