07: Mindset Shifts You Need To Make Around Dating
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Mindset Shifts You Need To Make Around Dating
Are you stuck in a dating rut, feeling like you're trudging through an endless cycle of disappointment and frustration? It's time for a change, and that change starts with your mindset.
In this episode of The Date With Confidence podcast, I’m exploring the importance of changing your mindset when it comes to dating so you can stop feeling like dating’s a chore and start to view it as something FUN.
Tune in now to hear:
1. The Power of Mindset: I highlight the influence of your thoughts and beliefs on your dating experiences.
2. Common Negative Beliefs: I address the common negative beliefs that people hold about dating, such as thinking "men are trash" or that dating apps don't work and how they impact your dating life.
3. Shifting Your Energy: I encourage you to change your perspective and approach dating with a positive, open mindset so that you enjoy every date you go on, no matter how it ends.
4. Letting Go of Expectations: We look at why you need to stop putting too much pressure on dates to be amazing and how a relaxed attitude can lead to more meaningful connections.
5. The Impact of Self-Talk: I share the importance of changing the way you talk to yourself and why you need to start believing in the possibility of finding the right match.
By shifting your mindset and embracing a more positive perspective on dating, you can create a more enjoyable and successful dating experience.
Abandon negative beliefs, immediately
The first mindset shift you need to make is to abandon negative beliefs about dating. It's all too common to hear phrases like "Men are trash," "dating apps don't work," or "dating is hard." These beliefs, whether they come from your own experiences or from the stories of friends, can become self-fulfilling prophecies. When you approach dating with a negative mindset, you're likely to encounter the very problems you fear.
Instead, challenge these beliefs. Replace them with positive affirmations like "I love dating," "I enjoy using dating apps," and "dating is so much fun." If it feels too untrue, try adding “I choose to believe…” to the front of your affirmation. For example: “I choose to believe I love dating”.
By shifting your perspective, you'll transform dating from a stressful task into a joyful experience. Embrace it as an opportunity to meet new people and embark on exciting adventures.
Embrace the excitement
Dating should be an adventure, not a chore. When you shift your mindset to embrace the excitement, dating becomes a hobby rather than a burden. Think back to your early 20s when everything was new and full of potential. Recapture that spirit of excitement and curiosity when approaching dating.
Imagine each interaction as an opportunity to learn, grow, and connect with someone new. By doing so, you'll not only make dating more enjoyable for yourself, but you'll also radiate a positive energy that attracts like-minded individuals.
Release expectations
Expectations can be heavy burdens to carry into a date. Instead of worrying about whether the date will lead to something more, focus on the present moment. Release the pressure of trying to make each date "the one." When you go into dating with an open and relaxed mindset, you allow connections to form naturally.
Enjoy the journey without pinning your hopes on a specific outcome. It's often the unexpected, imperfect experiences that make the best stories and lead to genuine connections.
Don’t dwell on negative experiences
Dating is not without its share of negative experiences, but it's essential to shift your perspective on them. Instead of dwelling on the terrible dates and disappointments, view them as valuable learning experiences. These moments can be the catalyst for personal growth and resilience.
When you look back on your dating journey, it's often the funny, shocking, or unexpected stories that stand out the most. Embrace these stories as a testament to your resilience and ability to overcome challenges.
Change your dating narrative
Finally, think about how you talk about dating. Do you often share stories of frustration and disappointment, or do you highlight the exciting and positive aspects of your dating experiences? Changing your dating narrative can have a profound impact on your mindset and overall dating success.
Share stories that emphasise the fun, adventurous side of dating. When you shift your narrative, you not only influence your own perception of dating but also inspire those around you to adopt a more positive outlook.
Approach dating with an open heart & mind
In conclusion, changing your mindset around dating is the key to transforming your dating experience from a negative and frustrating ordeal into an exciting and enjoyable journey. Remember that what you think you believe, and what you believe becomes your reality. So, let go of negative beliefs, embrace the excitement, release expectations, embrace negative experiences, and change your dating narrative.
Approach dating with an open heart and a positive attitude, and you'll find that it becomes a rewarding and fulfilling part of your life. By making these mindset shifts, you'll not only improve your dating experiences but also increase your chances of finding a meaningful and lasting connection. So, start today, and watch as your dating life takes on a whole new, exciting dimension.
Send me your dating dilemma
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Send me your dating dilemma 〰️
You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.
About Your Host
Rebecca Hawkes (you can call her Becka) is the host of The Date with Confidence Podcast, your go-to show if you’re tired of dating drama and ready to raise your standards without losing your mind (or your sense of humour).
After being blindsided by a breakup at 29, Becka turned her “WTF is happening with my life” moment into a journey of self-growth, self-worth, and a mission to help other 30-somethings stop settling. Now, she shares how to date with confidence, trust your intuition, and attract the kind of love that actually feels good.
Becka isn’t here for generic dating advice, she’s here to bring you the real, raw, and funny truths about modern dating. Expect practical tools, mindset shifts, and the occasional rant that’ll leave you feeling like you’ve just had wine with your best mate.
Want more? Sign up for her BTS with Becka newsletter here.
